The Relative Importance of Oranges

My Dear Fellow,

Today I had lunch with Princess Glamour* and John. 

We met at All Bar One on the corner of George & Hanover Street. I got a beer with a slice of lime in it and some chips which were served in a small bucket. It was great.

John is a lovely man, very funny and very laid back. He used to sit opposite me and be the mellow analyst to my stressed programmer, doing Sudoku puzzles and regaling us with stories of his wife and kids.

He told me of one occasion when he and his wife were at the bus stop. As the bus approached he reached out his arm to flag it down. It came closer... closer... closer...

CLONK

John found himself on his back. The wing mirror on the bus had smacked him square on the forehead and knocked him flat.

The bus driver opened the door. "Are you all right mate??" he asked.

"Oh don't worry about him," replied John's wife in an irritated fashion. "He does this sort of thing all the time."

John was “disappeared” in one of those Slack analyst culls a few years back. He took off his coat and put his orange on his desk and was immediately summoned to a super-secret meeting. He was told organisational restructuring blah blah, new business challenges blah blah, there's a taxi waiting outside for you blah blah.

It is funny the things that go through one’s mind at times like this.

“But what about my orange?” asked John.

He was assured that all his belongings, including citrus fruit, would be forwarded to him. 

It was a rubbish way to say goodbye - not being allowed to say goodbye. Fortunately he's kept in touch and is still laid-back and in good spirits. I wonder if it is because he's got his priorities right? Fruit is way more important than corporate restructuring. 

Now that I'm the mellow analyst, I try to channel a bit of John for the developers. I hope it makes them feel a bit better, just like he did for me.

Pass the Sudoku, my dear fellow. And hold on tight to your orange.

El P.

* Princess Normal, wearing make-up and a posh top.