White pipes

I'm assuming that these pipes are new down spouts for the flats, but we will see. 

Today payroll fell apart the way payroll has a tendency to do around bank holidays, and I found that I just could not be bothered. Some poor sod is not going to get his pension paid into his bank account, but there is nothing in my power to change it. 

I went into Tesco on the way home and found a nice bottle of whisky on discount, so I picked it up to find myself in the middle of an argument between two young men about alcohol. One declared that alcohol is a poison and a pretentious one at that. The other declared that it is an expression of culture and being educated about the differences in the types of alcohol is important. 

I told them I think it is a matter of taste. Whereby the educated one offered to buy my whisky if I kicked his 'mate' in the gonads whilst the educated one covered the camera. 
 
I declined. 

How do I get into these situations?