BEEP

My Dear Fellow,

Something in the kitchen is beeping. We do not know what it is.

We've switched EVERYTHING off. We've been through drawers and cupboards and stood still and turned around and looked up and closed doors and opened others and GONE TOTALLY MAD LOOKING FOR THE EFFING SOURCE OF THE EFFING BEEP.

It is not a constant beep. There are about 2 minutes between beeps. This is just enough time for you to think it has finally sto-

BEEP

Let us hope whatever it is dies overnight. As for me, the iPod will be in tonight. I think Er Indoors may sleep in the living room with the telly on.

El P.