The voice of his conscience

It's 14:12 Padraic. 
You should be back at your desk. 
Come on Padraic. I know it's 21 degrees, it feels unusually warm, there is a nice gentle breeze that feels like the sirocco. But your lunch break it over. 
Listen to me Padraic, there are spreadsheets out there that require your immediate scrutiny. 
It's 14:13 Padraic. 
You are really acting the bollix there boy. 
The Head Program Manager of Outsourced Tax Evasion is going to be very cross. Very cross indeed. 
You should be back at your desk. 
Wake up Padraic. Wake up from this dangerous reverie. 
It's 14:14 Padraic.
You really should be heading back.
Don't bother cleaning up the crumbs of your egg-mayonnaise-cucumber sandwich. I'll take care of that. No, really I insist. 
Come on, off you go.
Bye bye Padraic. You go back and crunch those numbers. 

I'll be your crumb hoover.