My dearest Purple

Purple is not well, once again.
Im working long hours at the moment and always are afraid of coming back home and finding Purple dead on the balcony..
He was in severe pain yesterday, I could see that in his sweet eyes..he is suffering from recurrent bouts of kidney and bladder stones and cramps..
Martinique and I always try to find out if the time has come where we should our little Purple let go...but very often he is on the mend quite quickly and then we feel very bad about those thoughts...
I know that in the end Purple will be the one telling us to let go..and Im just very afraid of that moment cause I love my dear Purple so much!