Udderly ridiculous

This is not the underside of a lactating cow but the permafrost inside my freezer, which has taken about 4 days to defrost.

The buyer for my flat wants no white goods left even though I was offering to gift them out of the goodness of my heart. Not a bad piece of kit, this freezer, once frozen udders have thawed.

Cue online posting to try and give away this and other bulky items for free with people ideally collecting them. Gosh, there are some quirky and flaky characters around including the person who tried to convince me Wisbech is between Ely and Cambridge (not a 45 minute drive in the opposite direction) and the first in line for the fridge who wanted to come after midnight as he had been delayed on a family trip to Hunstanton. And whose brother also in the car wanted to use my toilet as an excuse to show an unexpected interest in my romantic status. All exceedingly awkward.