I could do a better job myself and I'm no expert

I've got a friend coming round for coffee soon, so I bought a cake at the supermarket today. (Yes, I know I'm a lazy lump not baking my own, though I will make some shortbread, honest.)

It was only as I was putting away all the shopping that I noticed the 'EXPERTLY HAND DECORATED' label. Expertly hand decorated, my ****! (Insert whichever word you wish there, but I'm on the same wavelength as Jim Royle.)

I reckon there has been a knife smoothed over the icing and a few chopped walnuts sprinkled in the middle, don't you? Hardly a skilled craft...