FIFTY REASONS...

...for not barbecuing in the garden - in the wings, out of shot & up in the plane trees are another 450 of the fat bastards.

You put out a wee table & a few chairs - get the charcoal glowing away - and right on cue - from our ash tree, it rains...

Pigeon sh!t - I kid you not!

So wish Tom Lehrer was here - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TytGOeiW0aE

:o)