Five a day...

I don't have much time for government interference in my day to day life. I know how to drive carefully within the speed limits, I always wear a seat belt and I don't need someone telling me what, when and how much to drink.

As far as I can see, the only advice they've ever given me that is of any use whatsoever is to stick to a five a day diet. Heres mine.

In fact just to show how conscientious I am I sometimes make it seven or eight a day, fried bread, black pudding and baked beans. Sort of my acknowledgment of Olympic Year.