Behold - a very Happy Lighthouse.

Or is it, perhaps, a shiny Penguin or 100 dancing fireflies?
"We'll make sure you get one." - They said.
"You won't be able to miss it." - They said.
It'll be like one of the above - They said.
What they didn't "said" was:-
"We're going to sneak it into your household in a way which will lull you into thinking it's another bit of unsolicited Bumf and chuck it for recycling.

It didn't come addressed to Me, or Herself, or "Theo Cupier", it didn't come loose on its own, it didn't come "in a plain brown packet". It came tucked inside one of the club magazines which come as a result of being in Caravan club, R.H.S., National Trust, etc.
I counted this morning's unsolicited massacred trees and they numbered around 23, spread over 3 magazines. Six of the 23 were identical sheets, only one of which would have been of use - had we been interested.