What the Romans did for us

That first Brexit vote around 400 AD when we found ourselves out of Europe as the Roman legions and officials upped sticks and abandoned our ungrateful shores, did nothing to control immigration. Quite the opposite. After the Romans bled us white and took everything we had, the Angles, Saxons and Jutes all came over, took our jobs, wrote chronicles and wrecked what there was of the architecture. A right old mess it was. But at least they ignored the snails that had belonged in the "remain" camp.

Today the Roman snails, Helix Pomatia, are protected in the UK which is just as well as they are prized as the edible escargot just across the channel. Half a dozen of these cooked with garlic and butter make a fine start to any Euro-meal. You could have collected a basketful this afternoon in steady rain on the chalk slopes above Dorking. I'd left home thinking the sun was coming out. It didn't. So it looks like we'll have to go and find some.