Bet you can't guess where I've been!
Alright, bet you can!
But this time it's different. This time, it's... IN the field!

Moi: *Tramping through straw and stubble and dust and cracked earth* You sure about wanting to come all the way down here, Lou?
The Child (whose name is not actually Lou, but I call her that sometimes and she calls me Desmond, but that's another story): I'm as sure as your bum is big!

So, with that certainty taken to the bank - for there can be no certainty more certain - we tramped on down - well, half slid - to the bottom of one hill, and that is where I took this. Sitting down. In. My. Field.

On the way back up
Moi: I had forgotten what a joy you are sometimes, The Child...
The Child: I'm not much of a joy, I'm more like a bush elephant! Look at all the dust I'm making! We could be in Africa!

Nearly at the top, The Child, with stubble prickles on her toes and itchy legs, was stung or pricked by something and let off a scream loud enough to wake the dead, remind bats that it is time to get up, and frighten the horses yelled out quite loudly and assured me that she wanted nothing more to do with nature. Only she did so with her "Sweary Head" on and like the good parent I am, I collapsed. In a heap.

Granddad Blossom is really going to smite the pair of us with his smiting stick.

I think I shall take her back again tomorrow!

for Lou