Haar Maybe

I should come clean and admit I've never been quite clear on what constitutes the difference between regular mist and the Edinburgh Haar.

However, it sounds far more romantic to call this "The Haar" as walked through by me this morning at about 6.45 on my way to work.

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It’s our upbringing—there are just some things you have to do.

For example, some Tesco Bank folk were recently having a very animated conversation and saying,

“We need something VISUAL!”

It took all my self-control to not say,

“How about an old Steve Reeves moviehhh?” like Tim Curry.

Tesco Bank people must not know about my weakness for musicals.
Whip-crack-away, whip-crack-away, whip-crack-awaaaaaaay.

Symon N. Furter

P.S. Hey, did you know that Edinburgh Gin do tours of their distillery?
Would that be something which may potentially interest you as a night out?

Here is their website. I am assuming that SLI block it, but you never know.

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You will have gone home by now. I am still here. It is rubbish.
I was thinking about you this weekend, and what you told me about the official “Stop P1shing on the Seat” email that went out.

I remember you were very specific that it must be a bloke because girls don’t whooooosh everywhere.

But then I got to thinking—how do you KNOW?

Because—bear with me—while willies are pretty much standard issue,
it seems to me that foofs can be highly individual things.

 I know this. I did a lot of research as a teenage boy with my dad’s Scandinavian magazine collection.

So anyway, if waxing can make them do odd things, then imagine what a radically different foof with a wacky haircut might do if it were in a playful mood.

These are the sorts of deep thoughts I have in my “down time.”

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Managing to get it over the back of the toilet seat would be darn near impossible for a girl—even with a wacky hairdo.

You should have studied harder!

I have decided that Tuesdays are more depressing than Mondays, on the basis that it is the day I am currently experiencing.

You should come back and cheer me up. That’s my final say.