Wanted Dead or Undead
Police today issued a warning about the Zombie, NickMog. He is wanted in connection with feasting on the warm brains and still-beating hearts of all of the Project Managers in the IT department of the Open University.
He was heard complaining that this made up a surprisingly paltry meal.
In a statement released shortly afterwards, the University said that, to its surprise, productivity had gone up since the gore-fest and that it would not be replacing the devoured. It also said that, if the zombie, NickMog heard this statement, it (the University) really hoped that he wouldn't visit the Marketing department where, apparently, the biggest (and juiciest) hearts and brains were to be found. Because that would be awful.
Witnesses were unable to produce a photo-fit of the zombie but, luckily, police had several photographs of NickMog and were able to use them to produce a substitute photo-fit.
Members of the public are warned on no account to approach the zombie who is believed to be embalmed and dangerous.
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