How to make your own rainbow

Buy approximately 100 litres of thick gloss paint, shades spanning the entire colour chart. Then ride around with them on a bicycle trailer in the pissing rain.

It would have been almost worth the trusty trailer tipping over and splurging a magnitude of luminous lava like pigment all over the flooding roads, just to brighten up the deathly darkened sodden streets momentarily, but in fact, the DIY rainbow will have to wait until the little cherubs at Stanley Grove Primary get a hold of the brushes...