Careful

but you can't hide standing under these stars
they know everything, they know where you are
you're in your head, you're all turned around with it
and they're shining down their light to bring you back again
back where i can find you
to crawl inside you


-guster



[little plastic castles]



freneticism: the philosophy that the world is spinning crazily on a tilt, at much too frantic a pace to keep up, and the only recourse is to dig in and try to keep up.


lately i've been feeling removed, like i'm looking at my life like a child, all wide-eyed and gawking at the shiny goldfish in it's little bowl with a little plastic castle, swimming back and forth, each time the castle a surprise.

lately, i've been feeling like i need a break. everything is absolutely chaotic right now, and trust me when i say i thrive in situations like this, but not for extended periods of time. i've been spinning in revolutions for too long without a pause for air.

lately, i've been feeling like i'm ready. time to bring it back to center, to collect all the pieces of me that have been scattered about in myriad directions, to re-focus. all i can do now is try to keep it together until thanksgiving. home is such a beautiful word. 10 more days.


lately, i've been trying to accept the inevitable. there are things out of my control, and they are most often the things that are most important to me. sigh. here i go again.


in matters of love loss we've no recourse at all