Heisenberg

"I like your beard", said one of my Year 11 pupils.

"I call it a Heisenberg", I told him

"Ah", he said knowingly. "Like the teacher turned drug king guy from Breaking Bad on TV. Cool!"

"No," I said. "Because I am uncertain whether I like it and even more uncertain that I shall be allowed to keep it."

Another illusion shattered and street-cred demolished.