RE: IMPENDING CONE OF SHAME...

Woof!  Okay, I'm all for having a lump removed, and my teeth cleaned (at a push), but if they think I'm walking around my patch wearing a cone of shame they've got another thing coming.  Now I know that my vet will insist that I wear one after tomorrow's op, but... If 'they' refuse to remove the cone during my 'rounds', I will only set foot outside for unavoidable 'business' purposes and then only under the following conditions:

It must be dark.

There must be no other dogs in the vicinity at the time.

I must not, under any circumstances, be recognised by man or beast (cat, dog, rabbit, whatever)!  I'm a very private dog (apart from being a famous blip star, but that's different) and I don't want to encourage any local speculation about my 'condition'!

All these rules may seem a bit harsh on my caring humans, but look at it from my point of view:
 
     The indignity of the cone of shame cannot be underestimated...

Woof!
Alfred Dog.  :-)