Roses and babies

I wonder if I'll get any chance at all to do some work any time soon?! This afternoon, after swimming this morning, was supposed to be my chance to get the craft kits prepped but instead we have been out for chips and coffee, come home, and then I spent the afternoon on the sofa with the boy and the baby, both wanting cuddles.

Steve took the opportunity to fix the ceiling lights in the bathroom and just before Ben kicked Charley (accidentally, not hard, but enough to wake him up) awake Steve called down to say he was stuck. One of the plasterboard ceiling panels would not go back into place because some insulation had fallen loose and was blocking its return! So I had to assist, with a groggy Charley sat on the floor watching.

That done I tidied up from breakfast and fifteen seconds after I tipped the remainder of Ben's (now cold) hot chocolate away he came thundering galloping into the kitchen asking for his hot chocolate in the little white cup. The take-out babyccino costa cup. That got left at the café earlier.

Meltdown. Huge, huge meltdown. Now I could probably, quite honestly, say the number of meltdowns Ben had as a two-year-old could be counted on my fingers. As a three-and-a-half-year-old though, meltdowns are daily. All I can put it down to is a combination of tiredness from everything being incredibly exciting and interesting and really starting to click into place, the light evenings and mornings screwing up his body clock somewhat, growing both physically and mentally, and hormones. But the slightest thing is sending him over the edge at the moment! If something is not what he was expecting, he just can't handle it. It's so tricky negotiating these disappointments: acknowledging and recognising his feelings, putting names to them, and not just pushing him to get over it but to help him learn to deal healthily with such big feelings in a little body. TheSingleCrunch (a blogger I'm loving) puts it really well in one of her recent posts on meltdowns and mayhem:

I want my children to learn that they will not always get what they want, but that it's okay to express a healthy amount of disappointment, and to move on and to think positively despite it. Not that they need to bottle their feelings up, especially not just so I can save face in public."

This meltdown did end up with us all going out in the car to the café for another hot chocolate and a little white paper take-out babyccino cup but he doesn't always get what he wants. And he's learning that it's ok to express his disappointment.

And I'm learning not to be concerned about what other people may be thinking as my boy has yet another meltdown because he can't have a booby cuddle in a restaurant (I wish I could feel comfortable about nursing him in public but I don't) or his chips have bits of herbs on or I forgot his bike or we can't afford the shiny toys on display in the Post Office or he is just too tired to care anymore.

It's exhausting for me and Steve.

It must be HUGELY exhausting for Ben.

Anyway, we've ended the day all friends which is always a good thing. Charley's opted for an early night, and Ben although bouncing off the walls is tired and wants bed too. Perhaps I'll get some work done while I'm eating my dinner later....