I solemnly swear I'm up to no good.

Today I was on the Captain's Table. Which means that children who have been good friends at dinner time, or shown good table manners, get to eat their dinner with a teacher on a table with silver goblets, and placemats designed by the kids, and are served at the table by a dinner lady.

I decided to wear my Oktoberfest hat, as it had nearly caused Mrs Clegg, the Queen of Good Grub, to expire when I posted it on Facebook earlier in the week. When I appeared in the dining hall wearing it, she had to stop serving children and take a moment to compose herself.
The children decided that it made me a maths witch, and that I was going to turn them all into numbers.
I spent Wednesday afternoon chasing them round the hall pretending to be a zombie who was trying to eat them, and today a witch... who was trying to eat them. I'm seeing a theme. I imagine children are quite high in protein, and would therefore fit into my current diet very well.