Dog Day Afternoon/Evening with guns.

Big excitement tonight, high speed chases, police, guns (allegedly) and a really, really, daft dog.

Day 1 of dog sitting and teenage boy sitting. Obviously I've pretty much completely ignored the teenage boys because, well, it's a big, hairy, beautiful DOG!

It is a mental dog though. It's not used to much freedom so it was going doolally with happiness. I had to take two painkillers 4 hours in. The cats were the first to get majorly pi**ed off. Majorly Majorly pi**ed off. Fergus scowled and fled into the forest, not been seen since, while Thumper got stranded on the neighbours huge shed roof for hours. Meanwhile the mental dog was loving the full run of the house and garden, it never lay down, or stopped trying to ingest anything it could get its teeth into, from 12 noon to 11pm. He steals. A lot. He found an old minging mop head and gave me the run around. Then he nicked Tess' cushion, several teddy bears, a towel, the kids old beach spade, a solar garden light, a golf ball, the cats ball, it was endless. And cats, he would have nicked them too if he could only catch them. He never stopped, even when he fell into the pond...three times. Then he came inside for a bit, ripped all my bedsheets off, tore my duvet cover, blocked the tennis, stole clothes from the window cill and relocated our underwear. Then Dave came home and they had a boys love in. A two mile walk sniffing rabbits and sensing deer and he had barely dented his mental ness. The dog not Dave that is.

He's done Tess' head in. She's been feeling a bit left out and let down by folk of late so I'd hoped the dog hurricane would be a distraction. But After five years of pleading for a dog, 1 day with this springer and she says she'll stick stick to cats. And After five years of me pleading with Dave for a dog, he's bizzarely totally sold and I'm sure might just steal this one or someone else's.

Not long after we get back from walking, we hear news of bobbies running around chasing a local lad turned bad, straight out of the coop instead of Compton, but giving the boys in blue the run around. Missed him on the railway line by minutes as he headed up to Kingseat to escape. Just as we got home safe, and tipped off by PJ vigilante and fellow teuchter blipper Diane, a much perked up Tess and I rubbernecked from the window (no curtains to twitch) and saw the police arrive to get all LAPD on the foolagain hooligan.

And After all is said and done, I think she might just like the dog afterall. She's lying beside me, fast asleep, next to the dog.....who Is sulking because I've just liberated another teddy from his jaws.