Aspirants
I've long given up having my hair permed, crimped or coloured. But a while ago, throwing myself head first into an austerity programme that would have made David Cameron, our current prime minister,* proud, I also gave up paying to have it cut. Two years of using kitchen scissors and a couple of cleverly placed mirrors later, I ended up looking like Ken Dodd. I decided to cut back on non-essentials like food instead.
* only if you're reading this before Friday
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