Sorry...it was a BIG day!

Today has thrown me! I didn't even think of finding a good photo to blip so you've got an absent minded photo of the sun setting out my bedroom window (sorry).

Today I was retired...

It didn't wake up retired nor was it on my To Do list. I went to an occupational health appointment to get certified for work, which he was happy to do. But when we spoke about my return, I realised how little I was looking forward to it. It's not a very happy place, they've not been especially supportive and don't really want me back as they've moved on. The consultant was quite frank in the fact that it wouldn't be the place to heal and I was entitled to early retirement.

That was like being hit with a hammer! I've thankfully always been successful in my career and have carved myself out a pretty formidable career in my 14 years of working. However, it made me immediately think of the dreams I've passed over as 'I do proper work now' and once you get used to the lifestyle those bills bring, you're pretty much tied to that lifestyle.

So now, in a heartbeat, I have another choice. You forget that when change is forced upon you, sometimes you can force some back. Still, this is a BIG change but I found my mouth opening and saying 'Yes, that sounds like a GREAT idea!'.

I left the appointment feeling elated, lighter...then nervous...then worried then...WHAT HAVE I DONE! Did I make the right choice?? Was I talked into it??

I was mulling it over all night with my partner (who thinks its a a great idea) when my little sister called to say 'wow! For the first time you can be your own boss, only do the jobs YOU want and do all those things you could never do before'. This was followed by my local priest ringing and asking if I knew if anyone who could build websites as he runs a charity that helps kids from hard areas/lives go on a group holiday to Austria to have fun without fear.

Sometimes life has a way of speaking to you very clearly...