PLUM TUCKERED

Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right
Here I am, stuck in the middle back seat with you

Fruit growers, a whole new experience. We've never had fruit trees before and now we have three. A Bramley apple, a Gala, and a Victoria plum. From henceforth that corner of the garden shall be known as The Orchard.

As we had gone to the garden centre in Precious it was quite difficult to transport the trees home. My car would have coped far better and with far less tutting and raised eyebrows I am sure, and that was just from Precious. Here I am communing with Victoria Plum whilst the chauffeur drives us home.

G had spotted some nice fresh horse manure earlier in the day so he went off with a bucket and spade (in Precious for goodness sake!!) but it had been smattered into the road by then. So he carried on up to the farm and was invited onto their dung heap. Unfortunately he was wearing flip flops but he could hardly refuse the offer.

Less successful were the sweet pea canes. We spent an hour or so trying to put the kit together and get it to stand up. It wouldn't. Every time we got 6 legs up, one would collapse, followed by another and another. At one point G climbed on the fence to get a higher purchase but fell straight off again into a tangle of pea sticks and netting. It was like pick-a-sticks crossed with a Houdini act. Tears were running down my face and I was snorting with laughter in a most unladylike way.

I returned the kit to the garden centre and there was no quibble whatsoever when I said it was impossible to put together, in fact the shop owner laughed. An assistant took it from him and asked if he should put it back on the shelf. No, the owner pointed straight to the back door. I think he's had a few of these returned before. Or he's tried putting one up himself.

Anyway I bought some netting and we will use our ancient old pea sticks and string instead.

Hope everyone is having a restful Sunday. I am hoping to now.... from 5:30 onwards.

On reflection I think that's Gala I'm talking to but the title is so apt I think I'll stick with it.