In Awe of Motherhood
I will never know for sure just how many dandelion bouquets that I presented to my mother. It could have easily been over 100. And she greeted each and every one with complete surprise, wonderment and gratitude despite the yellowing of the knees on my pants. Each bouquet was put out for display in a central area of the kitchen no differently than she would display a fancy arrangement from the talented florist in our town.
Last night, I spent the evening in the lake home my parents built over thirty years ago and, today, I could not help but think of my mother most of the day. She was a remarkable woman and will be a force in my life until the end of my time. She was a stunningly beautiful woman with striking Italian eyes and skin. Her love for and devotion to her children and her husband were beyond real. She put more time and energy into her family than I thought humanly possible. She knew the gentle balance between being compassionate and loving but also letting you know where you stood. She was here to be our loving mother and shepard first and our friend second. But she was all of the above and I feel her love today. She also carried her love into the community and was charitable and kind and aware of the needs of those beyond her family. Each year, I remember her cooking two Thanksgiving Day dinners, one for us and one for a family in need or in illness. She would deliver dinner to them just prior to serving us. Her creativity was amazing and could be witnessed in most everything she did, whether it be her delightful decorating or art or the way she approached problems in her business. To her, nothing should ever be mundane and there is a solution to almost every conundrum which one can face. She had beautiful mind and a heart as big as the sun. She left us several years ago as that wonderful mind of hers was ravaged by dementia.
But as I thought about her today, I realized that she is not gone at all. I see her in my sisters and I see her in my mother-in-law. And I see her in my lovely wife. They say that many search for a life partner who has the qualities of their parents. Bonnie amazes me as much as my mother did when it comes to matters of the heart and home and she too has a gifted touch.
I want to wish all you who are mothers a Happy Mother's Day. I think the love between a woman and her child is the most special love there is. And I think mothering is likely the toughest job on earth. I am in awe of you all.
I read this meditation about a year ago. At first it reminded me of my mother but, as I thought about it more, it reminds me of many of the mothers I have known. It is by Merrit Malloy.
When I die
Give what's left of me away
To children
And old men that wait to die.
And if you need to cry,
Cry for your brother or sister
Walking the street beside you
And when you need me
Put your arms
Around anyone
And give them
What you need to give me.
I want to leave you something,
Something better
Than words
Or sounds
Look for me in the people I've known
Or loved
And if you cannot give me away
At least let me live in your eyes
And not your mind
You can love me most
By letting
Hands touch hands
By letting
Bodies touch bodies
And by letting go
Of children
That need to be free
Love doesn't die
People do
So, when all that's left of me
Is love
Give me away.
I just arrived home from an entire day wandering about in nature. It was completely devoid of electronic attachment but for the camera. I will catch up tonight with you but I have two things to say:
-I have not yet found the gnomes
-Thank you for generosity on yesterday's blip. You overwhelm me with your kindness.
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