Monster

Definition:-
a. An imaginary or legendary creature, that combines parts from various animal or human forms
b. A creature having a strange or frightening appearance. aprecious when Maud is having a series of 'moments' on the lead?
c. A puppy who does not behave very well?

I look like I'm sitting on the sofa with a giant crisp, right? Wrong. This is the inside of my bed.

I have been really naughty today. I blame the wind. It sends me a bit funny. I am apparently 'a monster'. But aprecious doesn't know anything about monsters if she thinks that. I've met loads, for example, the thing she waves around when her hair is wet, cars and lorries, and the washing machine.

You can't be too careful. They are everywhere. You'll be whiling away minding your own business and boom! So, you have to be constantly on alert...

and I'm not going to make that joke again... I've made it before. Britain really does need them!
We are on instagram now - I blame Owen Byron - aprecious46. This morning on the way to work I saw a woman dressed as a Roundhead and then, a peacock (actually I think it was a peahen) - it all happens in Rossendale. Sorry if I am a bit slow at commentating today. I have 8 more days at work (and about 30 days worth of work to fit in) before 8 weeks' PhD leave. I'm also going swimming with the evil 20 sec rest group tonight so will probably be shagged out after a good squawk really tired