Safety Pin.

I know it may sound silly, but you're like my safety pin. You hold me together when I fall to pieces and i'm in need of a quick rescue. This is just another of my random blips. Today I write about Bethan.

"Forget me not" is one of those sayings that pops into my head when I think of how long it's been since I've spoke to someone, or seen someone in particular. I can't help but worry they'll forget me if it's been a while.

There was something up with me this morning, so I missed first period today. I'd been texting Bethan that morning, we talked about serious things, and I realised how much I love her, I need her so much. I didn't mean to scare her, it's the first time i've heard her cry.

She saw me at break time after I came into school, I walked in and walked past everyone else and just wrapped my arms around her, It was that or start crying, I had to hold her, I was terrified. She held on tight. I slotted myself between her legs that swung off the edge of the desk, with my arms resting on her stomach, fidgetting with her jacket, and she crossed her ankles around my legs and held me around my tummy. I kissed her forehead and told her I love her. When I kissed her I ran my fingers along her cheek bone and she closed her eyes, she opened them just before I pulled back, and she smiled at me through bashful teeth. It'd been a while since i'd seen her smile that way.

Without the kissing, it was just like when we were friends. She makes me feel safe, like nothing can hurt me at all, because she'd just put her fingers through mine the way she did today, raising her palm to the air, and watching my eyes as my palm met hers and our fingers easily entwine, and everything just melts.

Things have been terrible , absolutely everything recently, but today my girl looked after me, she even let me keep my hand warm with hers in her pocket and squeezed my fingers reassuringly. She somehow fixes everything, even when I can't remember who I am.

Thankyou Baby. Your smile made today perfect and despite the torrential rain, the sun was fucking shining for us two.

Worry worry, worry. I'm getting my collarbones pierced and Bethan's getting her's. I'm buying it for her birthday. Then i'm getting my tattoo on my 18th. Hurrah! Shopping for Jessica's present making things tomorrow. (:

~

Give me love, like her.
Lately i've been waking up alone.
It's been a while but I feel the same.
Maybe I should let you go.
Maybe tonight, i'll call you.
After my blood, is drowning in alcohol.