I am a woman.

In my last holistics lecture we talked about masculinity.
The professor came and told the girls that this lecture was geared for the guys and besides taking a few notes it probably would not apply to us very much.

I took this as a personal challenge to see how many aspects of the lecture I actually could apply to my life.
I was not surprised when at the end of the lecture I probably had more of the topics apply to me than to some of the guys in the room.

As a girl, I grew up with the ideas that:
-Crying makes you a wimp
-Winning is everything
-Emotions are to be held in
-If someone hits you, you hit them back
-Never step down
Did I have a sad and oppressed childhood? Nope - it was fantastic actually. I was always dirty and smiling.

I was always one of the boys, and I was okay with that.
You would find me throwing a football, foot racing, and running around in the woods playing with bugs.
It was great.

It was not until literally a few years ago (I am 20 years old) that I realized that people cry in the open, express their emotions, lose and are okay with it and will just walk away when challenged.
I was stunned

I'm getting better at not giving into my old ways though.