AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

The above drawing is supposed to represent a moment in my day. Everyday at work I get violated in some way. If you can't tell from my diagram I was assisting in turning a patient whose ventilator tubing popped off and the tracheal secretions flew at my face and into my hair. Unfortunately I didn't notice the extra large glob of phlegm in my hair until after I washed my face and took the gloves off then went to fix my hair. Now I am drinking a beer (Never mind, I just knocked it off the desk and now it's all foam. Damn it, it was the last one.). Next, I will begin my third shower of the day. Maybe, I will remove some of other peoples crust off me.

To the co-worker who was fired this week. I was glad to hear that they let you go. I never said anything to the management but, I died a little inside everyday I saw you sitting on you?re a** when I was busting my butt. You were dead weight and maybe with you gone my days won't be as hard.

To the a**hole with the big truck whose front lights were blinding me on the way home while you were riding my tail: I know why you are such a prick, it's because you are paying $100 every 3 days for gas. Well, if you just slow down and get a less redneck vehicle you might save yourself a little dough and won't have to make yourself feel like a man by trying to intimidate people driving home from work.

For anyone concerned about HIPPA violations the above diagram and story is based on fictional events and any resemblance to any persons living or dead is purely coincidental.

Did anyone hear about Jude Law in Afghanistan? Hilarious I love that the celebs think they can just ask people to lay down their weapons and then we will have a magic peace day.

Oh yeah, and I found I giant roach in my kitchen. I couldn't cohabitate with him today so I hunted him down and killed him with a fly swatter.

BRING ON THE WEEKEND!!!