Bollards!

Let me introduce you to Billy and Belinda Bollard. They stand sentry duty outside school gates near my home, in a futile attempt to make motorists slow down. Periodically, oiks deface them with moustaches, spectacles and much worse. The teachers clean them up as well as they can and the stoic Belindas and Billys resume their duties.
A side issue, which seems to go unaddressed as they have been there for years, is that they frighten the smaller children to death.