Epic

Epic fail on star trails tonight - bedroom windows from ours and next door generated too much light.

Nothing else to do but arse about with the kaleidoscope effect and try and retrieve something from a bad shot.

Kinda like my day.

Observed lesson was interrupted 3 times. Frustrating, knocked my flow a little. Am supposed to be doing my self assessed feedback tomorrow - am finding little positive to say about it right now so am ignoring the whole thing.

Epic fail also on my skills as a kind and sensitive mother, when James finally confessed that he had not left his PE kit in school in a planned fashion on Friday, but had forgotten about it, left it in his form room and when he went back today it wasn't there. £50 of kit just gone. His fault. I went ballistic - not shouting, but the most persistent and nagging rant I have had in ages. He was on the point of tears. I told him not to cry, to get on with his homework and I left the house (Corin was home). I was RAGING. Came from nowhere. Not my normal reaction to something like that.

I went to Asda and bought temporary replacements - he has to have badged kit from school, so order form and cheque have been written as well. I don't have much hope of seeing the other kit again but he's been told to find it even so.

I had calmed down by the time I got back and sat with him for an hour whilst he did his Maths homework. All was well again, but only because he forgave me my ranty outburst.

So much for the prescribed medication starting to positively affect me. I don't feel any better. I am still in pain, quick to temper and feel utterly crap. It's only been a week, so I guess I need to suck it up, stop whining and give it another 3 or 4 weeks. I am feeling like I have been fobbed off - prescribe something that I absolutely did not want and tell me to see how it goes for 3 months ...another reason to defer investigative work. 12 months in reality since the symptoms started....

Oh, and my head still hurts.

I hope that mitigates against my raging.

Bad bad bad.

I'm going to find a darkened room now.