Beach Bum

You get a lot of seagulls in Portobello, no surprise I hear you say, but can you imagine the amount of do do that gets dropped in an average day.
Judging by the amount on my car (I've stopped washing it now) it must be several tons (thats the do do tonne not the metric variety).
At certain times of the year we get the phenomena of the purple do do, which has confused me for years, until a colleague told me it's when the birds have eaten the red berries, which is why it is seasonal.
For those of you that have no idea what I'm talking about I am of course talking about Scheiße, it sounds so much better in German.