The New Ice Age

Got up late this morning, must have needed the extra sleep, looked out of the window to find that for the first time this year everything was white.

This was short lived as by mid-day it had been mushed and slushed by the passing traffic.

I dont know what it is about this country, but as soon as we see a light covering of snow, the entire population seems to panic and drive like crazy people.

My father for example literally hibernates despite having a small maneouvarable front wheel drive micra that is perfectly adequate to pick its way around in the snow.

Others, clearly not as sensible as the hibernating father bear, seem to think that driving at 12mph along the motorway will save them for iniment accidents and near death experiences despite today's snow now being ninety percent liquid and no more wet or dangerous than an average day in Scotland.

Keeping up with the snow theme, we head off to Ocean Terminal with the children and see Happy Feet 2, best described as a mildly amusing cartoon musical featuring dancing penguins, a Sweedish puffin and an elephant seal with an Australian accent. Im not sure how an Aussie seal called Brian got to the Arctic pole, but there you go, he was mildly amusing.

I'm not sure why it bothers me how he got to the Arctic pole, considering that Im watching a film with talking, singing, dancing penguins and two adventurous exploring Crills called Will and Bill.

We have to park on the very top level of Ocean Terminal as clearly the entire population of Edinburgh and has decided to meet at a shopping centre and huddle together for body warmth.

When we get home John has arrived for his Sunday roast dinner, but before Connie has a chance to make the Yorkshire puddings, she falls dramatically on the ice roads. This explains why the Yorkies taste like soggy dough. The rest of the dinner was great, goose fat roasted tatties and rich roast beef gravy but these were made pre-fall.

After John leaves its time for bed and taking into account the tactic of today's shoppers we have to huddle together for body heat as for some reason our room is somewhere between sub zero, god damned cold and baltic. This is despite being under a goose down duvet rated to somewhere close to Tog a Million plus one.

It's so cold, I'm contemplating setting the wardrobe on fire, or rubbing two coat hangers together Ray Mearns style to create some friction to light the voil on the curtains.

I think that we might be entering a new ice age and not the kind with the funny little creature looking for his acorn. Brrr, first real day of winter today I think.