TSA Don't Bother Me!

Last night, 11/30/11 around 10 PM I looked like this. I was in for a "sleep study". I think it looks more like a senior citizen suicide bomber in training.

There were sensors everywhere! Well, almost "everywhere". I thought it prudent not to bring to their attention they missed a place or two.

I had a nasal sensor in my nose. They put something on my finger that lit up red to commemorate the upcoming Christmas season, I suppose. They glued a snore microphone below my jaw. Why would anyone want to hear that! There were around 10 sensors on my bald head, each connected with a gluey adhesive.

There are two cameras watching and recording every move I make, even in the dark. My privacy ... what privacy?

As is that weren't enough, they added two strong elastics, one over my stomach and the other over my chest to ensure my shirt would not come off.

Finally, I was hogtied with the two long wires glued to my shins running back up behind my head. I nearly gave up on making an escape or even to sleep, which ws their plan!

Around 12:30 AM I was "awakened" so I could be fit with a CPAP machine that fit over my nose which forced air into it my nose in addition to all the other paraphernalia. This was held in place by two "sling shot" elastics.

Finally, around 4:00 AM I escaped. don't tell them where they can find me!!!