Dear Santa.

Could I have a horse's head for Christmas?

Not only do they make a marvellous statement, the mafia link
sends out a message to all who visit me and I will gain respect from them.

Everyone has pedigree dogs or cats, but I want a horse,
well it's head anyway.
And it makes a refreshing change from the dreary old stag.

See what you can do.

By the way. I know it was you that made me go through that shit this year.
if you make me go through that shit next year, I will track you
down and remove your colon with a blunt reindeer antler, you fucker.

Love and kisses,

Ruby Jones. xxx