for daddy...

...with love

his name was harry bernard... a fine manly, man name - a strong name that made me think he would live forever - always be there for me... his princess daughter.

but it wasn't to be... i got a phone call in the wee hours of the morning - the kind of call that when the phone rings, you just know it's not going to be good news...

it was 4 years ago today that he died... very unexpectedly - he wasn't sick - no lingering anything... it was sudden and quick and took us all by surprise - and everyone said it was for the best. perhaps for daddy, yes... but not for those of us left behind. we didn't get the chance to say a proper good-bye... no real closure to speak of - just a sense of emptiness. and one where time has certainly healed the hurt to a degree - the sorrow and grief, but it can still take me unaware... the little things that will catch me off guard - staring into space, thinking of him.

this is the very last picture of the 2 of us... daddy was so camera shy. he thought the camera hated him - probably where i get it from. this was taken about 4 months before he passed on a trip i made back home... that i wasn't going to make but at the last minute decided to do. what a blessing - since it's the last time i saw daddy and therefore, was able to have a photo gotten of us - one of a handful of me with him as an adult.

i will carry with me those things dad taught me: how to live a life of integrity, to complete a job well, to be brave and courageous in the face of adverse times... to be steadfast even when i don't want to be. i will forever love golf because we bonded over it from the time i was a teenager and it's because of him i know how to speak up when having my car fixed at the garage - (i don't like it, but know how to do it...) i miss him every day but am ever grateful for the years he was with me - and that he was a steady force as a father in my life... that he always provided for me, always took care of me and never failed his princess daughter.

so although it's difficult to recognize he's gone from this earth... i hold close dear thoughts and treasured memories - for the love of a daughter will never grow dim and that makes...

for

a

happy day.....