Hips and Haws

I've known some guys that were hip and some girls that were ...

... up to speed with practical skills in year ten at school, whilst I still only had a scant theoretical grasp.

Maths is a point in case. My basic maths skills were good, I could understand anything that could be applied to daily life, I was positively enthusiastic about geometry but algebra was my bête noir. What was it with letters? Maths was about numbers, end of!
However, much to my teacher's delight, in year ten, my enthusiasm for maths escalated, mostly due to a new girl, who was told to sit next to me in the lowly set 3.
She was everything I wasn't and everything I wanted to be.
Barbara was Rubenesque, wore make-up, had dyed, styled hair, brown eyes and luscious lips.
I was Lowryesque, with spots, glasses and lank hair that my mum cut.

Barbara had a social life, going out clothes, drank alcohol and smoked.
I had corduroy trousers, my own vegetable patch and kept ducks.
But most fascinatingly of all, she had - in every sense of the word - boyfriends! And she liked to talk about them - mostly during maths lessons.

I sat transfixed, as she related the previous evenings' exploits, in graphic detail to me, her captive audience. The maths teacher didn't stand a chance.

Funnily enough I wasn't quite at the bottom of the pecking order at school, that honour was reserved for the geeks.
Out of school, I was friendly with one of the maths geeks, although we rarely spoke within school. We have remained in touch and she surprised me recently by telling me she learnt all she knew about 'the birds and the bees' from me.

It is said that one of the best ways of learning a foreign language is:
Hear it. Repeat it. Use it.

Barbara was already fluent
I was at the repetition stage
The geek was still at the listening stage.
I do hope Barbara knew what she was talking about!

My maths remains at a year 9 level.