To Cancer: I Hate You

This is a LONG LONG rant. Don't feel obligated to read it. I just needed to vent.

There are times in all of our lives where we meet true evil head-on.... and that evil hits us harder than a bullet through the heart. At least a bullet is quick--cancer happily continues to tease you until long after you think you've reached your breaking point.

Cancer is one of those true evils. Cancer doesn't discriminate between young or old, good or bad, healthy or unhealthy. Cancer targets you when you least expect it and it doesn't seem to care whether you want it or not.

Two years ago, I brought Collin to the vet because I noticed two lumps on his body. I noticed the first one several months before, but it looked like a wart. Collin had previously been diagnosed with a microbacterium, a form of canine leprosy that results in some abnormal growths. They were supposedly harmless so I kept ignoring the wart/growth thing until a huge welt popped up on Collin's left thigh. This welt was deep under the skin but it felt HUGE. Collin was only 4 though, FAR TOO YOUNG to have to worry about cancer.

While at the vet, I noticed another TWO lumps on Collin's leg (lumps that hadn't been there the day before). Dr. Yuan stuck a needle into all four lumps and came back with the news that they all were Mast Cell Tumors--cancerous tumors that effect cats and dogs. We were referred to Vet Cancer Group in LA, but ended up having Dr. Yuan remove the tumors (because he said it would be cheaper if he did it rather than if the specialists did).

When I went to pick Collin up after surgery, I stood with my camera phone at the door waiting for him to come out. He started walking out, then suddenly the tech yanked him from the door and pulled him into the back room. A minute or two later I heard SCREAMS. It was my boy. I never thought that dogs could SCREAM until I heard my boy do so--I can still hear it in my head now.

Apparently, this jackass, Dr. Yuan, decided that stitches weren't strong enough so he put in FIFTEEN staples into my dogs leg and shoulder without ANY anesthetic! Once he was finished, Collin came running out--hobbling on two legs. He JUMPED right into my lap--all 95 pounds of him--and began whimpering. No one at the vet paid any attention even though all the people in the waiting room were trying to help my boy. Finally, I'd had enough.

I made the tech come out and give him some pain medicine. She said this medicine could only be given once every 24 hours. I figured that meant it would WORK for 24 hours so we left.

An hour later, Collin was on the floor writhing in pain. I tried calling the vet, but they were closed. I was so stupid..... SO SO STUPID. Instead of fighting for him to get the pain medicine he needed, I assumed I wouldn't be able to give him anything else without him overdosing. I slept on the floor with him that night, carrying him out whenever he needed to go potty. The next day, Dr. Yuan prescribed three different pain medicines. It was too late though... I vowed I would never let that man near any of my pets ever again. (There was another incident where he nearly killed Benny....again, so SO stupid for not standing up for my babies sooner).

Two years later, Collin has been seeing the fabulous Dr. Davis at Vet. Cancer Group and he's been cancer free after receiving Chemo and oral chemotherapy. He also receives at least 3 different medicines every day to prevent further growths.

But we all know that cancer is a tease. Just when you let your guard down, it comes back full-throttle. I recently found some new growths on Collin. He's only 6 years-old (half his life-expectancy). Cancer, you're an evil, heartless, b*tch, but I will fight you till the end of the earth just to make sure my boy lives the life he deserves. I've already lost 2 aunts to this disease--I'm NOT losing anyone else damnit--not even my dog!