Bear of little brains

"Pooh?", said Piglet pulling at his rather large jacket, "What exactly are we doing here?". Piglet sounded a bit nervous which wasn't surprising considering he was miles away from the comfort of his home and unfortunately stuck with the only friend he had that, to be honest, would lose an IQ test with a carrot - not one of Rabbit's specials but just a common and ordinary, non irradiated kind. Of course he had to give it to his yellow coloured friend, he sure knew how to get into trouble. Lots of trouble... it's not really the fault of the bear though, after his accidental OD on honey his reaction to the bee made stuff would put Icelandic volcanoes to shame.

And this was how the pair of them ended up hiding amongst some tall grass, waiting for the rather irate hunter to get distracted by a squirrel or other critter.

"Shhh...!", hushed Pooh abruptly grabbing at his friends clothing to lower the pair of them. Small drips of second hand honey splattered into Piglet, but he was the lucky one unlike the hunter who still smelt like a bear had vomited on him - which was a very apt description as not too long ago the whacked out bear had done that very thing.

"Pooh, that hurt!", whined Piglet as only a future pork chop can.
"Shut up! Will you give me a break!", growled Pooh, "if you give me a second I have an idea!"
"But Pooh, you don't even know what bears are meant to do in the woods so do you think thinking is a good idea?", Piglet was starting to panic as never before had his friend looked as frightening as this. Woe betide those who would stand between honey and this one.
"Hang on,", Pooh continued as he reached into Piglet's jacket and fished out his mobile phone. Two button presses later and Pooh was speaking with a tad more excitement, "Eeyore, me old mucker, I've got a huge favour... I don't care what time of day it is you suicidal stuffed toy, remember that it was I who made those photos disappear and strangely, I have copies!" Pooh's face darkened as the voice at the other end screamed at him. After all, the Bear with little brains had been called worse.
"Five minutes, at the edge of the woods. And bring the jacket with the giant target on it... you heard me!"

Pooh turned to Piglet and said calmly, "Well, it was better him than me..."