OLD FARTS

Not very flattering but ...
Despite what you may have seen, the following combinations DO NOT go together!
A nose ring and bifocals
Spiked hair and bald spots
A pierced tongue and dentures
Mini skirts and support hose
Speedos and cellulite
Short shorts and varicose veins
A belly button ring and a big belly
Banana shorts and Depends
Halter-tops and a hanging bulge
Bikinis and liver spots, or bikinis and gray hair