Beware! Nothing is safe...

...when this dog is around. Lock up your shoes, insoles, socks and underwear. Hide your tissue boxes and toilet rolls, golf balls, footballs, pens, pencils and bags. Put away your empty flower pots, bamboo canes, gardening gloves and hand tools. Don't ever open the dishwasher when his around and STOP PUTTING JAYCLOTHS IN THE WASHING MACHINE TO SOAK UP THE EXCESS WATER AROUND THE RUBBER SEAL AFTER USE - YOU WILL REMEMBER!