Why Do I Drink So Much?

I drink far, far, more than the recommended number of alcoholic units per week for a woman. I have done for about the last 20 years or so. Fortunately I do not seem to have suffered any ill effects from this abuse of my body - though I have to say I have absolutely no idea what condition my liver is in.

So why do I drink so much? I drink because I like it, I drink because it relaxes me and I like the way it makes me feel, I drink because I'm bored, I drink because I think it's a social thing to do, I drink when I'm celebrating, I drink when I'm stressed ...................................... But more than anything I think I drink because it has become a habit which has become a big part of my life.

I'd like to think that I'm not an alcoholic - but actually I think I might be. OK, I don't seem to suffer any withdrawal symptoms if I don't have a drink for 2 or 3 days, I don't wake up in the morning desperate for a drink, I rarely drink during the day - in fact if I'm out for lunch I don't even like having a glass of wine because for some reason I only associate drinking alcohol with something that is done in the evening.

In the evening though I can drink a lot - it's not unusual for me to drink two bottles of wine.

However, I've never woken up with a hangover, I've never taken a day off work because of alcohol, I've never been sick, I've never not known what I was doing after drinking, never slept with strangers, never injured myself, become aggressive .................................. or in fact done any of the other things that are mentioned on every self help detox alcohol website I've visited.

However, the fact that I've visited 'alcohol detox websites' obviously suggests that I am worried about my level of drinking.

Should I be? I don't know? All medical advice points to the fact that I'm killing myself. Unfortunately at this present time I'm not actually motivated enough to do anything about it.

I hold down a good job, I own my own house, I'm financially secure, I eat healthily, my social life is good, I swim 3-4 times a week, I do a lot of walking, I go to fitness classes, etc, etc.

A lot of people would say I have it all - and I actually think I do. I am very, very content with my life and I honestly wouldn't change it at all.

So why is my level of drinking worrying me? Maybe I've just been brainwashed, via all the media coverage, into thinking that my lifestyle needs to be changed.

Yes, I'm a 'binge drinker' (according to the government).
.....................But I'm happy and as far as I'm concerned that's all that matters.