Paul by myself

By PJSHADOW

Path of fear.

If like me you have an overwhelming fear of dogs then you will be familiar with the feeling of dread I get every morning when I get to this point of my journey.

I can cover the brief incursion through the park in approximately sixty three seconds walking at a good pace, sometimes quicker if I hear a bark or spot movement from the corner of my eye.

Most times when I think I've seen a dog it usually turns out to be just a tree or a bench, but occasionally my worst fears are realised, mans best friend, leadless, owner far away and me stranded completely helpless.

If it's true that dogs can smell fear (and I see no reason not to believe this), then the fumes I give out must make them think I'm a mobile bottling plant of 'Eau de Terror'.

Fortunately for me the dogs I have so far encountered have resisted the urge to tear my throat out but it's surely only a matter of time.

Don't get me wrong I like dogs, Dogtanian and the Three Muskehounds was one of my favourite cartoons as a youngster. It's just that in real life, whenever they're nearby, they absolutely terrify me.

Maybe one day I'll get over it, but I doubt it.

On a lighter note I put £1.20 into a vending machine for some pop today and what I got in return was a half empty bottle of coke, lid still sealed, heated up to well above room temperature.

You've won this round cola machine, but with a certain powerful friend in high places I believe the last laugh will be mine!

Goodbye.

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