Flick of the switch

Jarvises do not like jostling at bars with non-Jarvises in a race to get served. Such mingling with lesser drinkers is to be avoided, as one would avoid discussing the finer points of, say, a Mick Taylor-era Rolling Stones album with a fan of Justin Bieber. There's just no point. So when a pub offers booths behind the bar with a service hatch and a switch to indicate drink is desired - thus ensuring prompt and direct service for the gathered Jarvises, who only need to leave their table in order to smoke outside or take a single fish - you can forgive its rather shameless hustling for the tourist ringgit. The Ghillie Dhu in Edinburgh's West End is far too tartanly tarty to ever be a real Jarvis bar, but the booths with the switch can tip the scales in favour of an afternoon visit.