Looking for Loveliness

Late this afternoon I stopped in at the grocery store to get the items we need to stock our shelves. In the floral section, I stole several shots of flowers. None were spectacular, so this will have to do. This day hasn't been spectacular either.

Because I have the privilege of working the afternoon and evening on Mondays, we decided this morning to once again drive to the other side of Riverside to the county hospital to see George, our friend and the music director of our little church, who is dying from cancer.

We stayed with him for approximately 90 minutes. I showed him the video I had taken with my phone yesterday of the kids doing their Palm Sunday program and singing. He watched and smiled some. He dosed on and off the entire time we were there. He is heavily sedated to lessen his pain.

Right before we left, I leaned over his bed, took his hand, got right in his face and told him we were going to leave and asked if there was anything he'd like me to get him or bring him, and he said, "Yeah, another round!" He didn't mean another round of beer; no, he meant another round of life. I laughed with him and said if I could I would.

So then loud and clear I said, "I love you!" and added, "if you get there ahead of me, save me a place and tell the others I'm on my way!" He looked at me and smiled. Then I rubbed his beard and through my own tears I said, "George you have been one of the most special friends I have ever had. Thank you."

The remainder of this day my heart has hurt, my eyes have overflowed, and a quiver has been in my every breath. I'm not ready for George to die. But if he is not going to get well, then I wouldn't choose for him to stay here in his weakened, ill state.

We thought that George was going to be moved to a "rest home" type of facility today; however, this evening we received the news that he is now running a temperature so the doctors would not let him be transferred today. We're not glad that he has an elevated temperature, but we are glad that he was allowed to stay in the hospital. Even though it is a county hospital, it is a very clean and very quality facility. They have a nurse assistant sitting in his private room 24/7 and we know he will not get that kind of special care in a "rest home" facility.

So when I got to the grocery store, I stood in the floral section a few moments to focus on something lovely because loveliness seems to be distant at the moment.

Good night from Southern California.
Rosie (& Mr. Fun), aka Carol