Still

life keeps moving, even if I wish
it would stop. When I was in school
and 80% of my energy went into
figuring out how to skip school and
waste time...I never truly understood
what not having any time meant.

It was a breeze to get the grade and
move on. Skip class for drinks, friends,
snowboarding, sleep, what have you.

I can't skip anything now. Looking at
the holes in my blips I'm beginning
to wonder how on earth I can't even
find time in my day to frame a snapshot.

I've always lacked a bit of discipline. The
flaw certainly comes out in post-college
life. Staying out late to drink until 2 (a
regular habit for the last few years, since
I worked in the service industry to get me
through schooling..) weighs heavier now
that I have to be up at 7:30 every weekday.

The word responsibility carries more weight
as well. It's enough to make the days when
waking up late and doing nothing until falling
asleep again seem years faded. Though they
were a mere six months ago.