No, neighbours, I was not dismembering him.

On such a lovely day, we had the sliding doors at the back of the house open. Cue intense screaming hysteria lasting hours ages because "creatures" were flying in. They were everywhere. Flying EVERYWHERE. Except no one else could see them, which made everything worse. The cwreatures were as big as a mouse but without a tail. Even shutting the doors did not help as they were Now Inside and can climb through gates! THEY CAN CLIMB AND NOW THEY ARE IN THE HOUSE! And also the sun was still getting in. The SUN! IN THE HOUSE! Even dressing him up as a knight going into battle against them (and me with my cucumber creature bishing stick) and raising an army of siblings against creatures did not calm him.

So this is him on the phone to Daddy.

Who had equally little success 3)

The only thing that worked was pizza.