We will live longer than I will

part 3 of 3

Lykke Li "Love out of Lust"

This album is beautiful. Lykke Li has matured and her songs about love and heartbreak ring true, like she lived through them and means every word. You can't help but wallow in self pity, but it's a release, a catharsis. Enjoy that feeling, but move on.

It was funny to hear my friend say this because I had pretty much just had the same revelation a few weeks prior (as discussed here), but she was giving dating advice. She said that the most important thing is to just be the best possible version of yourself that you can be. Be the guy who goes for jogs and takes his vitamins and reads books and gives mind blowing head. One day out of nowhere someone incredibly hot and smart and funny will fall into your lap and you'll know right away it was meant to be. I think that's pretty cute and actually fantastic advice.

My good friend Barrioboy asked if my father minded me taking all these photos, some of them sort of sneaky. He doesn't. He's actually the only person in my family who completely gets it, more than I even did. The last time I was in Greece I was trying to take some photos of my mother as she went about her day as we were chatting. She kept giving me the finger, making faces, anything to destroy any natural feeling I was going for. Then at some point as my father was walking by she shouted, "Stop that, you paparazzi! Why do you do this anyway!?" to which my father interjected, "Honey, that's not going to give him any solace when you're gone." Let that sink in for a second. It was so dark and not really meant to be, but he was right. I really got into photography when my grandfather started to get sick, really sick. I never really noticed, but I guess it's something I started so I wouldn't forget, so I would never have to lose somebody. I know that doesn't work. I'm sure it doesn't. At the very least my memories will stay clearer though, right? Maybe it will be easier to focus on the good ones. As I often do I'll end with an "I don't know".

Here is the final shot in this series of my father. He had to have an operation last winter and part of that meant he couldn't take one of his normal medications because it stuck around in his blood for too long. He had to give himself daily injections instead. This shot reminded me of the photographer Alberto Garcia-Alix whose work I saw at UCCA in Beijing last autumn.

Kiev 88cm
Arsat C 80mm
Ilford HP5+ 400 @ 1600
Rodinal stand 1 hour

posted 13/03/2011
from Benbecula, UK