A bit of peace

Is going to be nice this afternoon. This morning we had Boston College in doing an audit: after all they have provided us with £90k of funding in 3 months so I guess we needed to be looked at.

I took this picture blah blah early morning blah blah clear my head blah blah.

I shouldn't say this but the waste in my area of work is shocking. We are given £1350 for an individual to do an NVQ Level 2 in Plant Operations: this normally consists of two visits to their site maximum. How is that value for money? If that person wants a second NVQ then we get £760. So for two NVQs thats £2100. Today some of my guys are out and are doing 2 NVQ's for 4 blokes: £8400. Waste. It makes me feel guilty to even be in this line of work to be honest. The worst thing is that the government make it a requirement to get an NVQ level 2 in order to use certain bits of plant. So they make you have something, then pay an exhuberrant sum of money for us to deliver it in a half arsed manner. I point out this was a Labour initiative (obviously, seeing as its one that looks good from the outside but is just propped up with stupid amounts of borrowed cash).

I'm in an awful mood today. My car is too expensive to run and I had a little scrape in it the other day (no biggy, wall and sleepy me...). Then a stone hit my windscreen and chipped it, and now I have little choice but to sell. I'm proper pissed off really. I've contacted my mates Dad who runs a car lot see if he can helpme out at all. I'm gutted to get rid of it, always wanted a Golf but needs must. However he is a business man and is unlikely to do me any favours.

One girl from Boston College was lovely as well: tall, blond and a really sweet face. Luckily for me my colleagues didn't think I was worthy of an introduction, I mean after all of the £90k I'm sure I've only signed up about £30k's worth. Why would the person responsible for 30% of the sign ups need to meet the funding provider?

Past caring. Kirky came over last night and got stuffed about six times on FIFA. Made me miss Shameless as well, I must have been having 'fun'. Unusual for me.

I wanna be a regulator. I decided. I don't want to regulate 'any stealing of his property', although I will be 'damn good to'. I'm not just 'any geek off the street' either so I figure I can do it. I shall regulate the following:

1: People whom you let out at a junction who then fail to acknowledge. I shall regulate them by driving into them.

2: The woman across the road from me who takes up two spaces with her car thus forcing me to drive onto my front lawn to park. Just because I could afford a house with a front lawn doesn't mean you can have my space, you have a fucking garage! Get your fella to take fifteen years of accumalated crap out of that, then park there.

3: Pound shops advertising biscuits for a 'bargain £1' when the same packs are three for fifty pence in Tesco. I will be regulating by not buying.

4: Tesco for only selling shitty pound shop biscuits cheap and not chicken breast, pasta or butternut squash. I'll will regulate by shoplifting from you at every opportunity (nb not really)

5: Workmates who don't introduce me to pretty strangers in the comfort of my own surroundings. I could have been witty, smooth and slick. Instead I looked like the tea boy. I will regulate you by hiding key items of paperwork where you can't find them, then producing it once everyone is panicking saying 'it was there all along'.

6: People who wear matching tracksuit top and bottoms but who are not participating in sport. Why would you? I'll regulate you by shouting stereotype abuse about the dole, heroin and greasy women.

7: See point 6 but add 'and tuck their tracky into their Donnay socks'. See point 6's resolution.

8: I think that's it. For the next four hours though I'll also regulate any talking to me at all. I'm like a bear with a wasp sting wight on my ass: best just leave me alone. I'll achieve this by glaring at my screen and occasionally letting out a massive sign to signal my utter frustration at the day.

It could be worse though, I could be one of those poor bastards in NZ who have lost everything. Or I could be from Grimsby.