Happy Birthday, Texas

The big 1-7-5. That's how old Texas turns today. According to QRANK, Texas was its own independent republic for nine years until political and economic factors forced it to join the good 'ole USA. So here we are. 175 years later. Flying our flag as high as the US flag because we were our own country.

Yeah. I'm proud to be a Texan.

This photo represents the time I spent deep cleaning my apartment yesterday. Cleaning and de-cluttering. Look at that shine on my countertops. That's breathtaking.

Today was wonderful and beautiful and bright. Until 5:30pm. When I got back my grade from my exam yesterday. And then it just started heading downhill. And it took a turn for the worst about an hour ago. I'm not doing well. I'm not okay. And no, I don't want to talk about it. My mom and dad gave me hopeful advice. It doesn't really matter this year, there are some classes/professors that just kick you in the ass. And there are always other people who are going to "eat those exams". I know all of this. It just irks me that I studied that hard for an exam and it doesn't appear to have mattered. No, I didn't fail it. No, I didn't even make a C. But I tried my hardest, I thought I understood the material and I didn't get an A. Or even close to one.
It is frustrating. It makes me realize that I don't usually feel like this: where I've tried my hardest and it was nowhere near good enough.

Yes, I will shake it off. I've already started studying for my exam next Thursday. I don't have plans this weekend, so if I'm behind in outlining my lectures, I can study. I need an A on this renal exam. Until tomorrow, however, I will sulk and cry and go to sleep.

My dad reminded me tonight what I told my interviewer for my medical school interview when she asked me what I would do if I ever failed an exam. I told her I would go out and get a steak. A ridiculously delicious piece of meat.

And I thought about it tonight. So, tomorrow.. guess what I'm having for dinner.

The End.
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And my heart sinks when I see my photo from a year ago today.
I spent the day bringing treats to Ted and Nuria at the voting polls. Oh. Ted. I miss you.